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The way in which we view ourselves in relation to our circumstances has a powerful impact upon the story that we tell ourselves about life, and our subsequent attitude and reactions. If you interpret every situation as ‘happening to you’, rather than seeing yourself as an active and powerful agent in your life that can influence circumstances, you are playing a victim role in your life. You give power over to the external influences and simply react to what happens. On the flip side, if you view yourself as the main influence in the events of your life, you see yourself as a powerful element in the world, able to control and change circumstances through your attitude and actions. As I’m sure you can appreciate, seeing the world and your circumstances as something that you can affect powerfully is much more motivating, empowering and beneficial to chasing your specific goals. Try to identify your patterns of thinking today and the way that you speak about situations. Are you giving yourself a sense of control and agency in your life – being a victor? Or do you see yourself on the receiving end of life – a victim mentality?

We can all have high ideals and good intentions, but if the basics of life aren’t taken care of adequately, we can often frustrate our own progress without realising it. Sleep, food, exercise and self-esteem are the foundations that we ensure are generally in order before progressing to chasing higher ideals. If you are constantly exhausted, you are more likely to procrastinate, become irritable, perform poorly and make ill-considered decisions. Ideally, 7-9 hours of sleep is recommended to allow your body to mentally and emotionally process your day, repair any damage, reduce cortisol (stress hormone) levels and energise you for the next day. Fuelling your body with healthy food is just as vital – attempting to run on low-quality, nutrient-abandoned food is asking for miracles that your body is simply incapable of performing. Colourful, fresh and minimally processed food gives your body and mind the vitality to think, repair and perform at its peak – naturally providing you with the sense of energy that will assist in boosting your motivation to achieve other goals. Exercise is shown to provide MORE energy and increase one’s metabolism – often providing sorely needed ‘me’ time where thinking and focus allow you to practice overcoming boundaries and challenging yourself which can be transferred to other areas of your life. Self-esteem encompasses far more than it implies – it does not signify a huge ego, but a healthy respect and estimation of self. You must love yourself first, or you will not respect yourself enough to stay accountable to your own promises and plans and you will find yourself trying to gain acceptance from those around you, rather than performing in self-acceptance and quiet confidence that you will succeed. So, if there are any of these elements that are unbalanced in your life – seek to take tangible steps today and this week to re-balance them, and watch your other goals benefit from it.

The daunting mass of a big task or goal that we want to accomplish can often trigger procrastination and fear within us. Often, we worry about finding out that the task is too challenging for us to complete, and it is far more comfortable to have it sitting in the future with the possibility that we can achieve it at some later date. Our sense of capability is at stake, and by getting started, we may truly find out how much work there is to do. Does this sound familiar? Reading it in words should also help you to see how unhelpful this way of thinking is. Our fear of failure – or of success and a realisation of work to do – is often crippling to our dreams. The best advice that was ever given to me was, “Just Get Started”. Sometimes, we do realise that the workload will be much bigger than anticipated, but once you begin, you will find a sense of momentum or at least an ability to plan out steps of action that are necessary and can be completed in small chunks. The relief and satisfaction of actually getting started will feel like a huge weight has been lifted from your shoulders and you find a new sense of direction, purpose and drive has been waiting for you in the tasks that will take you towards your goal. Drafting and sending out resumes to new job positions, signing up for gym classes, registering your very own business, sending in a script for publication – all of these things are monumental start points, loaded with potential and motivation. By putting of the beginning, you are allowing your dreams to become perpetually in the future. And, one day, you will look back – probably blaming numerous circumstances – and wonder, what if? Wouldn’t you rather look back on the risks you took, the lessons you learned and appreciate all the doors that you opened for yourself?

The days of social media bring a tempting platform to project a life of perfection and joy, especially when a lot of your mind is concerned with chasing and achieving goals. Spending too much time in this online world, however, can cause some significant issues in life. It has become a common trend to do things simply to have a photo or to document them for social media – being present and enjoying the moment often takes a secondary priority, or is forgotten altogether. Yesterday, I saw a bus stop advertisement as I was driving by saying “Outfit Instagrammed 3 times? Time to revolve!” suggesting that you should on-sell or get rid of anything that has appeared ‘too often’ in your public profile. Surely, living life shouldn’t be dictated by what someone may have noticed once or twice before!? Studies have shown that the constant comparison of our real lives to the false and projected lives on social media are wreaking havoc on self-esteem, feelings of purpose and agency and a sense of self-worth. So, we are calling you to be real – bring your struggles and your victories to social media if you choose to document parts of your life. Don’t let your story be one-sided and false, but share your real journey. Or don’t! You could even consciously leave your social media alone on a few outings and see if it helps you to be more present and appreciative of the activities that you are doing. It is an individual preference and is fuelled by many different motivators, however, be careful that the presentation and depiction of your life on a social media platform isn’t robbing you of the opportunity to really live your life. This also goes for face to face relationships, opening up to people and sharing what you are struggling with often allows others to do the same. If you pretend that everything is perfect in life (sometimes it is!), you can limit the ability for others to be honest with you and relate with you on a more fundamental level. This isn’t to say you should always be negative – rather, sharing problems and looking for positive solutions together may be a way of building strong and supportive relationships that are much more effective in elevating your sense of connection and agency. So, today’s challenge is to be real with someone when you are tempted to falsely portray a life of perfection.

It is tempting along your path to want everything RIGHT NOW, rather than waiting and saving to invest in quality programs, products and lifestyles. For example, one of your goals may be to have a fitness tracker – however you want one so much that you go and buy a cheap and unreliable version which you find useless and uninspiring. It is probably better to do your research, plan to obtain the one that REALLY suits your needs, appeals to you visually and will inspire you to stay on track with your fitness goals. It may take you slightly longer to get one, but the rewards will outweigh the cost. It is the same with almost all things in life – if you choose to invest in a cheap personal trainer who isn’t qualified appropriately, you can expect correlating results. If you do your research and find the trainer that will cater to your specific needs, is highly qualified and experienced and dedicated to bringing you their best – your results will reflect that investment that you make and you will also find yourself more committed to your own results. When buying things for your home – it is often best to have one quality item that comes with a substantial warranty, rather than cheaper versions that constantly break and need replacement. You may believe that these cheaper versions save you money, however it is often not the case when you think of the sub-par performance, repairs and replacement costs over the years. With friendships – it is often better to choose fewer people with positive and supporting attitudes for your inner circle, rather than countless ‘surface’ friends who provide company, but not actual support and interest in you.

Another element of this is mental – when you surround yourself with quality investments – of time, of money, of emotion – you find yourself loving your life, appreciating your time, admiring the quality and handiwork of the people and things that you surround yourself with. Yes, parts of this seem superficial, but as humans we can recognise quality, beauty and genuine relationships and they do often yield significant impacts upon our mood. We do stress that material things are not the definition of life or success, but those material things that you need and love should be of a good quality to support ease and pleasure in your life. A lot of these ideas tie into the minimalism movement of having few things, but ensuring that they are both aesthetically pleasing and practically functional. What are you hoping to invest in for the near future?

It is essential to be healthy and structured in your life, this is something that we continuously recommend to our clients. However, there is a risk that you become a slave to your routine and forget to be mindful, present and excited about life. So, we often recommend scheduling in time where you can do something really exciting or unplanned – concerts, dinners out, travel and local adventures. It is not just inside your routine that life should have variety, with new skills being learned, new foods and workouts to be tried, new friendships to be formed – but completely new experiences to broaden and enrich your life. Visit a comedy night in your city with friends, train and run for a triathlon, attend a film premier, go to a convention or expo to be inspired and enriched about something that you may not have had much knowledge about beforehand. Booking tickets to these things (and arranging babysitters if needed) can keep you accountable to make sure that you are incorporating a variety of new experiences that will open your mind and keep life interesting. Be careful, though, it does become addictive and you become a much more interesting person as a result!

Image credit: Meaghan Eldurkin

Definition from Oxford English Dictionary – Tenacious (Adjective)

1.1 Not readily relinquishing a position, principle, or course of action; determined
1.2 Persisting in existence; not easily dispelled

 

Setting a goal and the path is sometimes the hardest part of changing your life, if you have the right mindset. Once you have developed a habit of being tenacious, or persistent, following the directions is simply a matter of switching off the idea that you are choosing to do something each day, but simply following a new routine. Once you begin to look at the actions to achieve your goal as a negotiable, you lose ground with your sense of tenacity and persistence. For example, if you are looking to improve your energy levels through fitness, you can book all your classes/sessions in for the week and simply recognise that these times are as set and firm as your starting time for work. They are no longer optional or dependent upon mood. They are a set part of your week. This can also be the same for eating well – you can do a meal plan or even all your meal prep for the week, so that what you eat is already chosen and requires no emotional input that may waver and test your resolve. Working towards a promotion or building your business? Incorporate an extra 25 mins a day studying business or performance improvement and implementing what you learn. Building habits helps you to grow in tenacity, it keeps you hungry and disciplined and soon, you begin to crave these sessions of self-improvement (usually after 14 days or so of consistent adherence to a daily habit). How will you grow in tenacity this week?

Some of us walk around with a number of goals in our minds simultaneously, which is great – however, if we can’t articulate how and when we plan to have these goals and the steps towards them realised, we may be inadvertently cutting ourselves off at the knees. For example, if one of your goals is to invest in Real Estate and another is to travel three times every year and you haven’t planned out an exact earning and budget goal, you may find yourself dismissing either or both goals in the name of the other – saying no to an overseas trip “because you should be saving for a house” and/or not adequately saving regularly because “I’ll probably end up spending it on travel anyway”. While both goals are wonderful, if they are not clear, broken down, planned and implemented, they can serve as barriers to you realising your best life. These goal conflicts can come in many forms and so the best way to avoid this is to set timelines and specific goals – visualising and articulating situations and circumstances in which you take steps every day. For example, It’s payday on November 26^th and I open the banking page on my app. I’ve been tempted to buy ‘X’ all week but I know that I have allocated $300 for saving for the house and $150 for travel saving. I set up a direct debit to come out early on payday so I don’t need to face this decision every fortnight. I do, however, check it when I have woken up and colour in the rising totals of savings on my progress chart in my diary and I feel incredible satisfaction at my discipline and I know that I am closer to realising those dreams. I soon forget about spending the money on ‘x’, but if the temptation doesn’t leave, I will do an extra couple of hours work and buy it for myself on 30^th November. Here the focus is not on living a life of deprivation, but realising the satisfaction of reaching long term goals and recognising the small steps along the way to build momentum. An essential component of this is to recognise potential temptations and addressing them in your visualisations – showing yourself that you are conquering them and moving them to the appropriate priority. So take some time this weekend to map out, plan and visualise your goals and process to give yourself direction and determination for the upcoming week.

At LLUMI, we begin by discussing self-image and rating our clients’ sense of self-importance. Why do we do this? Simple. If you don’t love yourself and take care of yourself, you will often be running into burnout, fatigue and resentment. If you spend most of your time looking after other people and neglecting your own needs and desires, little joy and appreciation flows from what you do. Even though you feel that you are being unselfish and helping other people a lot, your attitude will often detract from the potential joy and quality of the gift that you are intending for others. For example, if you find yourself working tirelessly to provide for your family, coming home and cleaning and cooking and organising everyone – you may begin to feel a sense of purposelessness and resentment creep in. Your exhaustion will not enable the situation to flourish and be one of contentment and love. It is best to look at a situation and identify where you can meet your own needs, so that the ‘giving’ part of you is well nourished and does not spring from a place that is empty and neglected. You may indeed discover that your loved ones will appreciate your uplifted mood over a vacuumed carpet, some quality time spent ‘hanging out and relaxing’ rather than a larger pay-check from the overtime you have worked. You are a human, you are designed to feel and to be renewed by rest, hobbies, interests and quality time spent with loved ones. It’s time to write down your typical week (or just the one you are presently in) and identify time slots where you can put yourself first, refuel and replenish.

Every day that you wake up, you have a new opportunity. You have the chance to have a day that is inspiring for yourself and others – to choose to make today as perfect as it can be by putting in your best attitude and effort. On the other hand, you can tell yourself, ‘one day won’t make a huge difference, I’ll just sleep in/skip breakfast/cancel that engagement, miss my workout, etc.’ However, as many of you have experienced, one day off (when not scheduled or thought of in advance as a rest period) can much more easily roll into a longer period of time. It is a slippery slope when you begin to lose accountability to yourself. It is the unseen moments of decision and determination which build your character. It’s those tiny moments where you refuse to let your alarm clock sleep again and you harden up and face your day with a positive attitude, when you put your runners on even though you seem to think bed will give you more satisfaction. Because, if one day doesn’t make a difference, then what is two days – a week? Everyday makes a difference. Every single step toward becoming a better you is worth it. It is worth the momentary struggle to overcome the barriers of comfort and strive for greater. As is most of our experience, once you actually get up and begin what you have considered avoiding, the discomfort gives way to a sense of satisfaction and pride in ourselves and our determination. So, if you are tempted to give in to your complacency today – we urge you to instead make today count.