Enjoying EVERYTHING

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Sometimes we have to do things that we don’t love doing. In fact, a lot of the time we do things that we don’t love doing. But they must be done. So we can ask ourselves, “how does my attitude contribute to, or detract from, my experience?”. If you have a compulsory course or job that you have to do or aren’t enjoying – do you show up, annoyed that you have to be there? Or do you put on an optimistic attitude and be open to learning something new, having a good discussion with a classmate or simply building the practice of discipline? If your house is a mess and you really MUST clean it, do you whinge and moan in your head the whole time and spend it in drudgery – ending up doing a half-assed job anyway? Or, do you put on some good music, grab a nice drink and get to work, knowing that at the end you will feel all refreshed and satisfied at a job well done? The reality is – most things have positive elements within them that can be found and enjoyed by you, if you choose.

Starting Fresh (Again!)

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With a new month complete in the new year, it’s time to celebrate the victories that you’ve made. Recognise the small steps that you’ve taken towards new habits for your best life and how great you felt when you did take them. Perhaps you haven’t yet established all of the great routines that you wanted – and that’s ok. Our lives don’t always transform overnight. Today, refresh and reset. Commit to completing the small tasks that you envisioned yourself completing to create new habits. Do them early in the day and create a sense of accomplishment from the very beginning. Success isn’t about the couple of huge steps you take every once in a while, it is the everyday decision to ignore your temptation to ‘have a day off’ or listen to your highly variable emotions that tell you that you don’t ‘feel’ like it today. Simply do it – leave your emotions and excuses at the door. All you need to do is complete these actions for 21 days in a row and they will become almost second nature, and results will soon follow.

The Lies About Moderation

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‘Everything in Moderation’ – the principle of good health. Allow yourself to indulge, but in moderation. There is one problem that is evident in our culture – most people simply don’t know what moderation actually is. People personalise moderation by using negative comparisons to justify the amount that they eat/drink/smoke/work. The comparison that you want in your life should NOT be the lowest common denominator, “Well, I know people who drink two whole bottles of wine every weeknight, so two or three glasses every night isn’t so bad”, or “My aunt smoked a pack a day and lived to be 94”, or “I know skinny Shirley who eats Maccas 3 times a week and is healthy as a horse”. These people are NOT your guidelines for moderation. Instead, we should be looking for the most healthy examples in our lives or (if there aren’t many in your circle) in healthy media. We all know that our diets should consist of mostly raw, unprocessed and plant-based foods with small portions of meat and plenty of water. Alcohol can be healthy in moderation (which is, at most, 1 glass a few nights a week). Smoking has NO healthy side effects and is detrimental to every area of your body and life. We don’t take strong stances on many things, as we believe in personal choice and preference – however, when it comes to health, the facts are black and white and this comparative moderation misalignment is dangerous and prevalent in our society. It’s time to reassess.

Old School Hard Work

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We all focus a lot on our motivation and inspiration – this is a great thing to do. But there comes a time where all of your planning and direction needs to be put into action. This is the time where you need to buckle down, put off distractions and temptations to ‘take a day off’ or procrastinate. Investing your concentration, time and energy is the bulk of success. Yes, it is true that working tirelessly without direction is pointless, but the only difference is ensuring that you are working towards your goal – but also working tirelessly. How are you going to put in the effort today and say goodbye to your excuses?

Are You Wasting Time?

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One thing that is equal for everyone, no matter where you live, your race, gender, values, beliefs, or wealth: we all have the same 24 hours in a day. Yes, many of us have commitments, but we also have choices about what to do in our time. Sitting down at the beginning of each day and ensuring that you maximise those 24 hours to prioritise your wellbeing, state of mind, productivity and the happiness of yourself and those around you is a core component of satisfaction and success. A day without a plan is great on the occasion, however if this is a regular occurrence – are you surprised that you aren’t making steady progress? It is like being in a boat without a rudder, you can float around furiously and be exhausted, but you may not get anywhere. Break your day down into 30 minute slots and tick off the activities that you want to accomplish. I guarantee you will feel much more motivated and satisfied!

Possession Vs. Experience

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For some reason, whenever I have enjoyed or admired something, I feel a desire to possess or own it – perhaps in an effort to hold on to that feeling of admiration for a lifetime. However, if I look around at all of the things that I own, I barely notice the objects or possessions that I once got so flustered over. I’ve come to a realisation that possessing an object or memento to try to remember a place or time isn’t really necessary anymore. I have those memories, sometimes I have photographs. I would much prefer to reflect on the actual moment that I enjoyed so much and fill my life with more of those experiences, rather than trying to chase the physical objects that I falsely believe conjure up emotions for me. Granted, some objects are sentimentally and personally significant – however I think our emphasis on THINGS rather than people and experiences could go a long way to alleviating our desire to spend and possess. We are doing a huge clear out of our home this week to make room for more experiences and to get rid of the mental clutter!

Optimising Your Interactions

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A significant portion of our lives these days are lived online. Whilst this can bring many benefits for business and networking, there are also traps involved that endanger our patterns of thinking, our habits and our influence in the world. A lot of internet discourse is focused on gossip, fear-mongering and ridiculing others. Keyboard warriors are at the ready with the confidence and self-assurance that they will never be held accountable for their words face to face. However, if you want to be a better person, feel better about yourself and improve the world in which we live, focus on building other people up. Where you see weakness, show compassion; where you see something that annoys you, keep scrolling or add something productive. Threatening others or belittling people who have different opinions to yours is not something that adds to your life. Rational discussion can be enriching, but when two people are unwilling to hear each other, sometimes it is best to disengage for the peace in your own mind. Great people do not step on others to get ahead, they use and support the strength of others around them.

Create a Refuge in Your Home

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Home should be a place where you relax and unwind – not another source of stress and to-dos. Of course, we have things to do at home to maintain it, but if you have created a home that is full of clutter with projects that you keep meaning to do/fix all over the benches – this is not somewhere to relax. Assign a weekend and pull everything out of each room and pretend that you are moving house. In order to make decisions about what to keep – ensure that the things bring you happiness, beauty and/or utility. Anything that is broken or planned for later should be actioned within the next fortnight or recycled/donated/discarded. Anything that doesn’t bring beauty or regular utility should also be placed into one of these three categories. A simple and easy to clean home can bring a lot of peace and tranquillity – a refuge for your busy mind.

Don’t Do It All Yourself

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A lot of us feel pressure to have a perfect façade and to always handle everything ourselves. Sometimes, however, it is time to ask others for help and feedback. If there is a step that is looming in the path on the way to your dreams that you don’t have the skills or knowledge to overcome, look around you. We are surrounded by communities of talented and caring people that feel incredibly satisfied with sharing their knowledge and resources to help you in your journey. In the same way that we give, others also give. And now, with social media, asking for help is easier than ever – and by doing that, you can encourage others to be vulnerable and do the same.

Things Are Not Going Smoothly!

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Perhaps you have started on a new venture this year and you have made some progress, but it isn’t as easy/enjoyable/smooth as you anticipated. This can be extremely discouraging, especially if you are in a pattern of negative self-talk. You may listen to yourself saying things like, “I knew this wouldn’t work”, “This just isn’t for me”, “Why even bother?” and the classic, “I’ll just start again next week”. This is a critical time in which many people slide back into their old habits because, in their view : they tried and failed. But no journey ever goes exactly the way we expect. It is usually these trials in the early days that build the resilience and skills that you will need later and also make your success that much more satisfying at the end! So, ignore those negative thoughts and push through. It may not be perfect just yet, but imperfect progress is better than no progress at all. Stick with it!